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Shannon
from Winnipeg MB
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I have 2 ghosts in my house named "not me" and "I don't know"- any ideas on how to get rid of them!? |
Stop eating spicy foods and reading "Family Circus" before bed silly!
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Camper Girl, Calgary Alberta
The new center of the universe
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Is it really wrong to give a guy a "hand" when at a comedy show? |
If by a "hand" you mean applause? By all means! Clap away!! "The
clap", however is a totally different thing and not welcome at all!!
Any other things that resemble a "hand" depends on a comics
relationship status. This comic is not available for anything but the
first one on the list above.
- Daddy Makk
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| Heather in Barrie, Ontario |
Who is smarter; a blonde living in Ontario or a tattooed fifteen year old living in Quebec? |
I'd have to give the nod to Ontario blonde as she does not live in Quebec!! The only province the Canadian Unity Tour will not be visiting!
- Daddy Makk
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Marla Michaux
Pittsburgh, PA
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Why do the Jehovah's Witnesses CALL themselves witnesses? |
Because what other people call them is not fit to print!
- Daddy Makk
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Camper girl
in Medicine Hat AB
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What is the size for "press on nails"???
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Most "cougars" tend to use a size 69 while some tend to favor the 68 (he does her and she owes him one)
- Daddy Makk
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Happy girl in Calgary AB
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Why are the lumberjacks In Smither, B.C. so darn cute?? |
Are you sure it is the lumberjacks you are attracted to and not the big woody they drop?
-Daddy Makk
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Happy girl in Calgary AB
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Why do I fly to Smithers, B.C. but my luggage stays in Vancouver??? |
That is a good question. WHY do you fly to Smithers BC?? I think your luggage was trying to tell you something!!
- Daddy Makk
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Fly in Calgary AB
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Why does the sun rise in the east and set in the West??? or why do most
men think the sun rises and sets on them?? Just Curious in Calgary |
Well I can see you skipped out of science class where they explained all about how the earth rotates clockwise around the sun (thats the big bright ball in the sky). So"It just does!! will have to do as it would take too long to explain.
As for the men? Try dating less egotistical ones that are happy with the moon rising and setting on them!
-Daddy Makk
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Shelly in Brooklyn NY
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Daddy Makk, How do I get over my neurotic attachment to unavailable men? And Cheetos? |
I would switch it to a neurotic attachment to unavailable women and Doritos to give you variety!!
- Daddy Makk
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Chris in Ottawa Ont.
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Is there a heaven and hell? |
yes there is and I have done both of their gigs. Absolute Comedy, The Comic Strip, The Comedy Nest are all heaven gigs. Hell usually sounds like Fairview AB and the beer is warm and not free.
-Daddy Makk
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| Missy in Grande Prairie |
What number can be divided equally to get the number zero?
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The number of things the husband gets to keep in a divorce, after dividing it "evenly" he gets ZERO
- Daddy Makk
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| Tom in Saskatoon
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What's a schmeeb?
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It is a street term for tatas or sweater fillers. Hope that helps
-Daddy Makk
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| Stacy from Slave Lake |
What is your version of the meaning of life? |
Currently I have version 2.0 but am hoping to upgrade to the newer version soon!
-Daddy Makk
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Marla M. M.
Donora/Pittsburgh
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What if the Hokey Pokey REALLY is all it's about? |
This is a question that many ask but it neglects to explain beer, steak, pizza and women that say "yes". There is more than just your left foot to put in and take out!
-Daddy Makk
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Abdul
Montreal Quebec
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Are you comming back to Montreal soon or at least to ON? I would travel to see one of your shows again maaaaaaaan we had fun last time you were here. |
Well Abdul, since you did not leave your email I can only hope your helmet doesn't stop you from checking back here. Yes I am!! That's all I can tell you. Think...February. The S-M-R-T ones will email me!!
- Daddy Makk
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Jan
Calgary AB
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If you were rowing up the river in a canoe without any paddles, and your back door flew open, how many dougnuts would it take to fill a doghouse? |
Fist off, you can't row without paddles. Second, canoes don't have doors. Third, you can't fill a doghouse with any food because he'll eat it. Fourth..what are you smoking?
-Daddy Makk
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Trevor
Saskatoon, SK
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Are you my daddy? And if you are.....where's mommy? She hasn't come home yet ? |
Trevor, you're drunk again. Go to sleep!
- Daddy Makk
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Swanky Sal
middle of nowhere
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I'm just wondering if you can tell me why my doctor looks at me funny when I go for my girly check up, and he asks when the last time I had sex was? I asked him if he meant with, someone?He never did answer me...... |
This is what happens when you go to your veterinarian for a girly check-up. Double check you've booked the right medical professional next time!
- Daddy Makk
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Trevor
Saskatoon, SK
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Oh Great Daddy Makk! NO ONE has been able to answer this question. Your my LAST hope! OK here it goes...........How much wood could a Woodchuck chuck if a Woodchuck could chuck wood? |
While the internet is still a new novelty in Saskatchewan and "Google" may sound like witchcraft to the prairie folk in S'toon, I found this in under 30 seconds.
Answer to Woodchuck Question
- Daddy Makk
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Mr. Y
Saskatoon, SK
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So whats better? Schmeebs, tatas or hooters? |
I'd have to give Hooters the nod on this one. Their buffalo wings are fantastic, the waitresses know how to dress and there are locations all over. The other two pubs I am not familiar with
-Daddy Makk
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Marla M. M
Pittsburgh, PA
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Well, since u answered the woodchuck question(which I wanted to ask) Can u tell me how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop? |
Since a tootsie pop is one solid mass of the same unidentifiable, hardened goop, it has no real center, unless you count the stick. Getting to it depends on one's tongue strength and enthusiasm in licking, thus there is no real answer. Don't forgret to brush!!
- Daddy Makk
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Marla M. M
Pittsburgh, PA
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If u can lead a horse to water, then why the hell CAN'T u make the bastard drink?! |
First you need to determine if the horse is indeed male (i.e. a bastard with unwed parents) Hint: If it has a really big "outie" underneath it is male. Lead it to beer as ALL males will drink that. If its a female we all know it is hard to just force a lady to do your bidding...even if she is of the four legged-hoofed variety.
- Daddy Makk
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